When we enter in relationships we enter into the world of the unknown. We try to fuse two people, two upbringings and two ways of thinking into a harmonious balance of one. It’s an art really, so many fail because it requires work and dedication. A relationships brings up things that we have hidden. We give another the key to the most intimate and sacrade truths within us. We allow them to remove our masks and see the ugly, the scared, the insecure, the angry, the real us. An intimate relationships, has the key to our unique self and we consider that key sacrade. If it was not, we would give it to just anyone, but we don’t. Two individuals growing, evolving and sharing all they have in order to create something new and beautiful.

Why then, do we allow others to enter into our divine union? I still remember the classes I took before marrying my husband. The priest told us to look at each other and to see if we really liked the person we had in front of us. He mentioned that there was no magic wand that would change this person and what you see is what you get. He also said something that now, looking back, had a lot of truth. “This is now you family, everyone else is just an acquaintance.” Why was this important? Many of the couples that have married or united since then have split up because they did not let those words really sink in. They started allowing opinions of friends and family to interfere in their creation. In the union of two the elements allowed to enter change that story for the good or the bad.

Everyone has their own agenda. In reality we never know what is truly running through the mind of another. We do not know if someone has your best interest at heart or if their opinions are based on their personal traumas or interest. So, why would you allow a party of two to become one of three or more? What happened, what can be done to adjust your relationship in order to bring back that divine union? Where is the trust that you had? What was the catalyst for your change? Do you still want to create?

With time I have found out that there really is no such thing as a good guy. No one is ever clean of any guilt. Even in abusive relationships,there must be an agreement between the two for it to continue. Relationships are just that, to help us create new versions of ourselves. RealizING what we have learned, what works and what needs adjusting. I read onece, that becoming an adult was realizing that we had to unlearn what was taught to us as children. This is true. A intimate relationship helps us open our eyes to many of the cracks in our foundation. At times it’s easier to think that the evil person in the story is the same person we fell in love. Why do you think that is? They really aren’t the bad guy, they’re the ones forcing us to look at the cracks and fix them. These lessons and opportunities for evolution comes from allowing the relationship of two to remain that way.

Today, I decide to call out all of us in relationships. See if the troubles that might be due to an extra player if the creation story. See if where some house cleaning has to take place. Consider what has been learned, where this story is going and if there are adjustments that have to be made. Make the adjustments necessary and choose to evolve through the hard work of the creation between two.

Like always, I send you all love and light and wish for you all the best. Zaida Velgara….Becoming I Am

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